How to secure an extra $550,000 by not arguing to win.

Many of us enjoy engaging in persuasive discussions with friends, family, colleagues as well as when negotiating with another party.  We are simply in the pursuit of convincing them to  give us what we want or to agree with our point of view. 

Persuasion is rarely effective. More commonly, it results in the other side building a moat around their own point of view and hardening their own position.  During this process we often hear the phrase “yes, but…..”.  That exchange has simply morphed into arguing to win the point- not an efficient nor effective use of time. More importantly it is not a negotiating.                                                                                                                                            

During your negotiations our suggestion is to invest in asking a series of simple open-ended questions.  These demonstrate our curiosity in our counter-party's needs and worries and how we may be able to assist them.  For example:

• Why is that important to you? 

• What would you like to achieve from our negotiation? 

• Just suppose I could assist you with that, how would it help you? 

• What are your priorities? 

• What is most important to you? 

Once you have explored and understood their needs and worries, constraints and drivers, you are more likely to be in a position to trade them what they want in return for what you want - negotiating, rather than persuading.

Recently, we learned that one of our clients secured an outstanding outcome that was in excess of $550,000 of additional value by the use of simple yet disciplined questioning of the needs and worries, drivers and constraints of their counter-party. 

It was the asking of questions that opened the door to trading in differential and additional value.The skill of asking questions, of being curious, has the potential to deliver significant benefits to both parties even during the most challenging negotiation.

Join us on our Advanced Negotiating Skills Program - together with other participants you will learn to apply the many simple and pragmatic skills we teach to secure better outcomes and additional value.